Here’s the paragraph that made me snort on the bus today:
I noticed a stuffed spaniel poised by the fireplace with a yellowed newspaper rolled into its mouth. Madeleine said ‘That’s Balto. The paper is the LA Times for August 1, 1926. That’s the day Daddy learned he’d made his first million. Balto was our pet then. Daddy’s accountant called up and said ‘Emmett, you’re a millioniare!’ Daddy was cleaning his pistols, and Balto came in with the paper. Daddy wanted to consecrate the moment, so he shot him. If you look closely, you can see the bullet hole in his chest. Hold your breath lovey. Here’s the family.